I Can't Waste It... I Just Can't...

Knowing that one day I will die. And if I'm lucky enough to have thought beforehand, I will look back and know I did the right things to the best of my ability. My legacy. That I helped my mom. That I helped people around me. That more people loved me than hated me or resented me.
My 'why' is my family and my legacy.
I have extreme goals. Because having anything other than big goals is to not truly live.
This is why I changed my life to have as much control over it as I can. I make my own hours. I command what I listen to on the media. I go to the gym and do my best to eat well. I don't advocate for harm against ANY living creature unless rightfully deserved.  I do what I can to be the best I can be because the people who love me deserve better from me. I OWE IT TO THEM AND MYSELF.
So, even tho my burn to greatness might be slow, I accept that and know that it is the macro that is what matters and not the micro, while at the same time ACKNOWLEDGING THAT IT IS THE SMALL ACTIONS OF BUILDING BRICK BY BRICK, that will actually lead to my  desired end result.

Love. It all comes back to love. I love my family.  I love my mom. She deserves better Bc she got sick and her life was completely flipped into terror and awfulness by something she COULD NOT CONTROL.  She didn't have the chances I have. So I can't waste it. I just can't.

This segment is a response to a close friend going through great depression and another with extreme thoughts of suicide.  when asked what my WHY was and how to not give up, this was my answer.

I love my family.  I love my friends.  I love anyone trying to bring something great to the world and those around them and I feel patience and hope to those that are still finding their way. I DO NOT WRITE THIS SAYING I DON'T HAVE THE SAME STRUGGLES. I write this to shine light on why I refuse to give in/up even when I am at my worst.

One life.